How to Get Published – A guide
As you may know, there are many ways to get published and everyone has a different story. I thought I’d be really helpful and research all the ways and put them in a list. I hope you find it useful.
- Pick up your favourite book of all time. Invent a time machine and go back into the past before the book was published (you’ll find this handy information in small print at the front of the book). Cross out the real author’s name and write yours. Send it to the publisher of your choice. N.B this is not ethically the best option, but it is a popular one – a whole heap of my best work has been stolen, including all of the books supposedly written by Roald Dahl.
- Write a manuscript but before you send it to the publisher, change the name of the author to read someone famous like Andy Griffiths or Paul Jennings. During the final edit of the manuscript tell your editor there is a spelling mistake with the author’s name and get them to change it back to your real name. The publishers will be angry at first but they’ll have put so much effort into getting the book ready that they will still print it. Alternatively, you can just change your name legally to Andy Griffiths or Paul Jennings and avoid this last part. If you change your name to Paul Jennings you might want to dye your hair grey (if it isn’t already so), just in case they want to meet face to face.
- If you can be bothered, you could write a manuscript and then rewrite it and rewrite it and rewrite it and then find some people who know something about something and get them to read it and give you notes. Then you can rewrite it and rewrite it. Then, you can research the sort of publishing houses that publish novels like the one you have written and check out their websites because they usually tell you how to submit. This option is only recommended for those with dedication, perseverance and a great big love for writing.
- There are some great initiatives out there to help people with their manuscripts before they submit them to a publisher. If you’re in NSW, their branch of the Children’s Book Council of Australia have a Frustrated Writer’s Mentorship Program that has categories for both young writers and adults. Check it out here. There are also a whole heap of manuscript appraisal services out there – do your research and use one that really specialises in the type of book you are writing. Sometimes writers get too impatient and send off manuscripts before they are ready and then the rejection that follows can make you not want to show it anyone ever again.
- Finally the best way to get published is to have a lot of money and employ a good ghost writer. A ghost writer is someone who does nearly all the work but then you get to put your name to the finished book. It helps if you are a celebrity and too busy to write it yourself – if you’re not a celebrity it is more difficult to get away with this option but not impossible. I have a ghost writer named Walnut but he’s a monkey.